ASK US WEDNESDAY: “Should I recommend my friend for a gig I can’t do?”

by Leo Wiles
07 October 2015

Ask Us Wednesday NEWI’ve worked with a woman who has become a good friend. She’s a great friend but not a great freelancer. When I was her editor her work was sloppy and a bit slapdash. She was also not great with deadlines. I’ve recently had to turn something down and she’s asking me to put her forward before anyone else, and as she’s my friend, normally I would without thinking. But knowing her as I do (professionally) I don’t feel I can. What would you do? Tell her the truth? Lie? Say someone else got to me first? Ella

As it’s often who you know not what you know in our industry, I can understand your natural inclination to help, Ella. However, given what you know of your friend, you really need to consider both your friendship and the relationship you have with the client you’re recommending her to. Because not only could you lose both, but your reputation could crash and burn alongside hers if she does end up being the slapdash sloppy car wreck you suggest.

In the past I have had a very hard line about NOT recommending friends (having learnt my lesson at 18 when my best friend went to work for my family and smoked pot before and during work hours!) My realistic grown-up concern is that even though you want to help out when you recommend someone, it makes you legally and ethically liable. And while obviously I am not a lawyer, there are cases in the US of people being sued for negligent misrepresentation in references and referrals.

Playing devil’s advocate though, today I was booked for two photographic jobs. Both by personal recommendations from a friend I made by contracting for her and from a mum at my kid’s school. Both this friend and schoolyard acquaintance are however familiar with my work practices and skills, which I imagine made them feel comfortable with putting me forward. You on the other hand are making it clear that there is vast room for improvement with your friend professionally.

Recommendations in general can be dicey, especially the more you know the person. A few years ago I was put in the position of vouching for a girlfriend with a drinking problem. My character reference sailed very close to the wind. I played up her good points and stayed well away from recommending skills that she didn’t have. On the flip side a few years back I was asked what I thought about a former female editor who I knew to be an A grade psychopath. Wanting to avoid lying and or charges of defamation, I again kept my cards very close to my chest. I didn’t trot out hearsay or gossip, but stuck to the facts as I knew them in a non-inflammatory way. In your case? I’d take the middle road. If you’re ever in the position of recommending her, focus on the fact that she’s a friend rather than a former co-worker; that way you can talk to her character and not her work ethics.

With all that said, my advice is to tell her that it looks like it’s going to someone already on the client’s radar and commiserate with her. That way you both get to drink, her to commiserate for not landing the role and you for a potentially narrow escape.

Have you ever been caught out or rewarded by recommending a friend? We’d love to know.

Leo Wiles

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